Chappell Roan says she’s been diagnosed with severe depression, but she hasn’t been feeling sad.
The “Good Luck, Babe!” singer-songwriter, just named best new artist at the MTV VMAs, tells The Guardian she’s “in therapy twice a week” while on the road for her Midwest Princess Tour. The trek currently has her in London (Sept. 21), with a stop in Berlin next (Sept. 23) before she returns to the U.S. for a handful of concerts, beginning with the All Things Go Festival in New York City on Sept. 28.
“I went to a psychiatrist last week because I was like, I don’t know what’s going on,” Roan shared with the publication for a profile released on Saturday.
“She diagnosed me with severe depression — which I didn’t think I had because I’m not actually sad,” she said. “But I have every symptom of someone who’s severely depressed.”
Roan’s symptoms have included brain frog, forgetfulness, poor focus and “a very lackluster viewpoint.”
“I think it’s because my whole life has changed,” she said of her current symptoms. “Everything that I really love to do now comes with baggage. If I want to go thrifting, I have to book security and prepare myself that this is not going to be normal. Going to the park, pilates, yoga — how do I do this in a safe way where I’m not going to be stalked or harassed?”
Later in the article, she said that “every time I walk through my front door, it just comes out of me … I can’t even help it, I just start sobbing and either being so angry at myself for choosing this path, or grieving how the curiosity and pure wonder I had about the world is somewhat taken away from me.”
The upside of fame: the opportunity it brings. “I get to feel the energy of other people. It’s so cool to have shows so packed and have so much joy in the room,” she said.
Roan — whose debut album, The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess, reached No. 2 on the Billboard 200, and who has seen seven songs chart on the Hot 100 in just the past five months — isn’t alone in experiencing complex feelings about fame (“I was warned that it’s going to feel like going through puberty again,” she told The Guardian. “My body does feel different. It’s holding tension in a very different way: I have all these new emotions and I’m really confused”). She’s bonded with peers in the industry over the pressure that comes with such a sudden rise, meeting up with Sabrina Carpenter and texting Lorde for advice.
“We’re both going through something so f—ing hard,” said Roan of Carpenter in a recent Rolling Stone cover story, sharing that the “Espresso” hitmaker “feels like everything is flying, and she’s just barely hanging on.”
Roan has been open about how she’s feeling with fans, too. In August, she penned a statement on Instagram about setting boundaries with those engaging in “predatory behavior (disguised as ‘superfan’ behavior) that has become normalized because of the way women who are well-known have been treated in the past.”
“I embrace the success of the project, the love I feel, and the gratitude I have. What I do not accept are creepy people, being touched, and being followed,” she wrote.
The singer-songwriter, now 26, has also been candid about pre-fame mental health struggles. Roan was diagnosed with bipolar II disorder at age 22.
She described her childhood experience in an interview last year with the University of Southern California’s Daily Trojan: “Being bipolar, I was so depressed as a little kid and so angry. You just think you’re such a bad person, and don’t realize that you’re really sick and need help, and our parents don’t know how to deal with it. I think it’s like rewiring my brain to be like, ‘Actually, you’re a good person, and you’re creating a safe space and music for people to dance to.’”
In 2022, she posted on Instagram about her bipolar II disorder, telling fans “it’s pretty hard to keep it together” and balance work and fan commitments with her therapy schedule. She noted, “I don’t really talk about it much, but it affects me daily and is a pretty big part of my music.” In 2023, she wrote about it again on Instagram: “i am very fortunate and grateful to have my dream job,” she said, but added, “This job is very difficult for me to process and maintain a healthy life & mindset. I already have difficulty regulating my emotions because I have bipolar 2 disorder.”
Read Roan’s latest conversation with The Guardian here. Roan’s upcoming tour dates can be found on her official website.
